And that Day, the Tequila Gods Smiled Down on Seijuurou Mikoshiba
by SquickWrites
Summary: Seijuurou grinned. "Considering the amount of alcohol I consumed, and how far I roamed off – I should probably be dead." /aged up boys! drug and alcohol mention/


**A/N: tbh this is prob my fave fic i've written in a while bc it's some of the writey-ist stuff i've done in a while?**

He didn't have a drinking _problem_ but the problem was that when he drank enough, he be_came_ the problem. And tonight, he had definitely drank enough. Like, three shots of tequila, two high ball glasses of neat vodka, all on top of five beers enough. Like, jello shots with some unknown amount of alcohol, enough. Like, questionable brownies that _probably maybe most likely_ had some sort of marijuana, enough.

And, see, he may not have gotten straight A's in high school, but he knew better than to drink and drive, or be (maybe?) high and drive. That was just wrong. Someone could get hurt like that. So, his friend who he'd driven here was planning to stay the night, and _he_ wasn't going to drive, but he also didn't really trust himself to stick around with strangers and one totally intoxicated friend, so he figured he needed to go somewhere else. The only somewhere else close enough was the Matsuoka's, he was sure.

Rin lived there, and his cute sister hung around a lot of the time, and he was pretty sure he could trust them. They were, like, _somewhere_ down the street, he was pretty sure. Maybe across the park. Maybe through the ramen shop. He doesn't know how he got there. But he was very impressed when he sort of came back to his senses, and looked up to see the familiar apartment building.

If Seijuurou had learned one thing, it was that the guy at the front desk was not very kind to strange friends showing up at 4am completely hammered. So, he'd gotten used to hitching a ride up the fire escape. The ladder wasn't down, so he struggled up the tree next to it, then reached out for the contraption and swung aboard. The metal clanged loudly beneath his feet as he clambered up the steps, very concerned about whether he would die trying to get there, but more and more self-satisfied with each successful advance.

Finally, he reached the window he was aiming for. He had his screwdriver at the ready, because this exact event happened every so often, and he needed to be prepared at all times, just in case. He got to work. In a solid minute, he had the window pane screwed off and laying on the landing, and his arm was in, reaching for the handle and unlocking the door from the inside. After the door was open, he was sure to screw the pane back in. Seijuurou may have been drunk and high as fuck, but he was still a gentleman. Once these mundane tasks were completed, he stumbled through the door in search of the couch.

Despite his lacking state of consciousness, Seijuurou _did_ notice that the couch was somewhere totally different. And it was also a completely different couch. Also, Rin's TV was missing. But these might have just been personal choices that he'd made, and really didn't need to let Seijuurou know about. And, since when did Rin have a cat? He didn't know. Same difference, anyway. The cat wasn't doing anything, so whatever. He found the couch, and he collapsed onto it.

He was exhausted, and tired, and so incredibly swelled with pride. He made it all the way through town, and he'd used his better judgment to avoid talking to the guy at the front desk, and he'd climbed a tree _and_ a fire escape, and he'd broken into an apartment courteously, and managed to navigate the apartment's entirely new setup, all while probably nine sixteenths of his brain functions were suppressed. _And_ the tequila hadn't made him throw up. He was a champion of sorts. The cat was sitting on him. He had also won a cat's affections. This was so great.

The sun was up by seven in the morning, and Seijuurou would probably have rather died than felt the sun waking him up. It burned, all of it burned him, everything burned. His eyes were burning, his skin was on fire, his head felt like it was imploding, and he was pretty sure that his clothes were trying to smother him. The cat was licking his ankles to try to cool him off, he was certain, but its tongue just felt like sandpaper trying to rip his skin off. He snatched his foot away. The motion made his head erupt. He groaned loudly, making it worse.

"Mia?" A light voice called from the other room.

Seijuurou convinced himself that it was Kou. Just with a completely different high pitched voice that made his ears ring. He moaned again, trying to get her to stop.

"Are you o-" There were footsteps, then a hesitation. "...Kay..?"

Seijuurou opened his eyes. The light was blinding. He rolled over onto his back. Pain.

But then, this silver hair came into his field of vision, followed by this skin that looked like damn near _porcelain_, and these really big, baby blue eyes.

Seijuurou did not know this person. Either Rin was absolutely fucking around without him, or he was absolutely in the wrong apartment. Either way, he knew what he had to do.

"Heaven. When you hurt yourself in the... fall." Seijuurou pushed out, his jaw aching now. "Did you hit your eyes? Of coal?"

This look of absolute terror crossed the other guy's face. But Seijuurou could not stop. He couldn't just give up mid-flirt. He had to finish out strong and redeem himself.

"Because diamonds. They shine."

The fear turned into extreme confusion, then concern. "I'm sorry, are you okay? Do you need me to get you something? Please be okay, I don't know what to do if you aren't."

"Of course I'm okay. Now that you're here." Nailed it.

The boy was blushing now. Mission accomplished. "Oh gosh, sit up, sit up, I'll help you out."

And next thing he knew, Seijuurou had this guy's hands massaging his shoulders and gently pulling him up to lean against the arm rest. He swatted his own cat away, setting Seijuurou's legs up on the cushions as he shoved a pillow behind his back. Then he stood at attention, biting his lip and twiddling his thumbs, severely unsure of what to do.

"You're an angel." Seijuurou blabbed out.

"Are you high, or drunk, or just hallucinating?"

"None of the above."

"Then what -"

"Uhhhh." Seijuurou snapped his eyes shut, trying to get the pounding out of his head. "Let's say I made a lot of mistakes last night."

"Oh no, I'm sorry." Now the stranger was kneeling next to him, massaging his temples. "I don't really know much about this I'm sorry."

"S'okay. You – you're doing great. Just. That." Seijuurou moaned, happily this time. "Try not to stop doing that."

"What can I do to help you?"

"This is so good. This right here. This is so nice."

"Uh, okay." He said, continuing the circular motion with his thumbs. "Do you want anything to eat? Any breakfast?"

"I know the science behind all of this. I need a banana, toast, and gatorade." Seijuurou nodded along with the motion of his host's fingers, trying to get the most out of it.

"No. Drink water." The stranger said, standing and, much to Seijuurou's dismay, taking his fingers back. He disappeared off into the kitchen, the cat following behind him.

By the time he got back, Sei had successfully pondered and solved the meaning of life, then forgotten it, and began to wonder about his chances of getting into bed with this guy. Then he stopped that, because it was weird, and he was a total stranger, and he really wanted his toast.

"Here you go!" He called, showing up in an apron (who needs an apron to make toast? Seijuurou did not know. Seijuurou was not complaining.) with a tray. "Try to get all of that down, okay?"

"Yes, dear." Seijuurou accepted the tray. Neither of them reacted to the pet name. There was nothing to be done about it.

"You're okay though, right?" He bit his tongue, now looking nervous. "I just want to make sure you're okay."

"Do you even know me?" Seijuurou asked, peeling the crust from around the toast. "You're being awfully nice, you know, for a stranger."

"N-no, I don't know you. But you're friends with the Matsuokas, aren't you? They're my neighbors. I see you around a lot."

"Ah, so I'm not completely foreign to you. It's nice to know I've got such a cute neighbor on my side."

"Uh, anyway, how did you get into my apartment?" He asked, handing Seijuurou a napkin.

Seijuurou nodded, swallowing the crust. "I broke in. Through the fire escape window door."

"I don't understand."

"I keep a screwdriver on me."

"But _why_?"

Seijuurou sipped his water. "Why the screwdriver or why did I break in?"

"Both!"

He flinched. The neighbor slapped his hands over his mouth, silently apologising for being so loud.

"Well, I keep the screwdriver just in case I need to break in." Seijuurou blinked twice, finally downing the last of the bread on his plate. "And I was trying to break into Rin's apartment. Next door, I guess. The guy at the front desk doesn't take too kindly to drunk strangers – I know that much."

"Oh, so, you were drunk." The neighbor nodded, still looking slightly concerned as he sat on the couch, careful not to touch Seijuurou as he did so.

"Mostly drunk. And maybe a little high."

"Oh."

"But I did a pretty damn good job about it." Seijuurou grinned. "Considering the amount of alcohol I consumed, _and_ how far I roamed off – I should probably be dead."

"You should."

Seijuurou nodded in agreement. "Do you have any pills I could pop for this headache, or something?"

"No, that's bad for your liver."

"You're no fun."

"Boohoo."

Sei rolled his eyes. "Oh, so you're feisty too."

"I'm not _feisty_." The neighbor pouted. That was such a cute face. Seijuurou wanted to pinch his cheeks. Seijuurou accidentally reached over and pinched one of his cheeks. The neighbor looked terrified.

"Shit." Sei spat, covering his mouth with his wrist.

"What? Regretting how strongly you've been coming on to me?"

"No. Not that. I don't regret that at all." He replied, gagging a little. "The tequila's finally getting me. I need a bucket."

"Oh. Oh god!" The neighbor shouted and ran from the couch to the bathroom, bringing back an empty trashcan.

Seijuurou was still kind of out of it, so the silver-haired boy grabbed his head, guiding it towards the bucket. He kept the pail between his knees as he 'sh, it's okay'ed the tall boy as he vomited between his legs. Seijuurou could already tell that this was something beautiful. This boy was something beautiful. Not just anybody will let you throw up between their legs. This was _the one_, and he knew it.

Somewhere between hurling, Seijuurou managed to bark out, "I'm Mikoshiba Seijuurou, by the way." He barfed again. "In case you wanted to know."

"Don't talk and puke at the same time. It's weird and gross." His new friend hushed him, still doing his best to coo calming things into his ear.

When this vomiting session finally came to a close, the neighbor rushed to the bathroom to get paper towels. He pushed Seijuurou's head up from the bucket, wiping at his face gently before handing him back the cup of water.

"Drink that."

"Can I have more toast?"

"Yes, you can have more toast. But eat your banana first."

"Okay, honey."

He finally returned with the toast, and another glass of water for the stranger on his couch. He kneeled next to him again, softly pushing the disgusting pail of human waste away from them.

"My name is Nitori Aiichirou, in case you were wondering."

"That's absolutely beautiful." Seijuurou shoved the top of the toast down his throat. "Just like you. Beautiful."

"I don't even know you and you just threw up in my house and ate all my bread."

Seijuurou nodded, chugging the water. "I know."

"You do?"

"Yeah, I think that's the kind of thing that makes us soul mates."

"You think we're soul mates?"

"Yeah. This kind of shit doesn't just happen by accident."

"Go back to sleep, you're not making sense."

"Your cat likes me, so you should too. Maybe I should move in."

Nitori picked up the toast, and slammed it into Seijuurou's open mouth.

"Shut up and eat your toast."


End file.
